Shame can be excruciating. I’m sure you, like me, have memories that can still bring that flush of heat to your face and that sinking feeling in your stomach. You feel overexposed and vulnerable.

For sensitive people, shame can be a too-frequent companion: you feel things deeply, especially criticism, and you are conscientious, which leads you to question what you did wrong when you find yourself in conflict.

As unpleasant as overt criticism or conflict is, you at least recognize it as the source of your shame when it happens. You can take steps to address it, which can be a comfort.

The problem is that the sources of shame aren’t always this obvious. They can be subtle and insidious, thought the effects are no less devastating.

That’s why it is so important to know how to catch the more subtle signs of shame. Then you can move into the “bigger you” of Presence and hang out with this “something in you” that feels ashamed. This will bring profound relief even before you get to the bottom of the shame, because now this part of you is no longer alone with its shame.

In this six-minute video, I go more into depth about how to recognize shame and why it’s so important. 

Photo credit: MicPhoto by David Papillon on Unsplash