HSPs may be too nice to bite. But we can hiss.

HSPs may be too nice to bite. But we can hiss.

Can you be too nice? Yes. In an effort to be nice, HSPs can stop being honest with ourselves and others. This creates trouble in our relationships.  In a recent session, I shared with my spiritual director a challenging situation I was struggling to deal with. In... Read more
The gift of anger

The gift of anger

What do I mean by “the gift of anger?” Isn’t anger something to be avoided, or better yet, transcended? Maybe, but I can’t seem to avoid getting angry, and I suspect transcendence will take me several lifetimes. In the meantime, though, I have a powerful option. I can... Read more
To head off conflict, acknowledge your point of view

To head off conflict, acknowledge your point of view

Even when a conflict seems insurmountable, a powerful action is always open to you: you can acknowledge your point of view. Then you enter a different world, one in which respectful disagreement is possible and people sometimes, miraculously, change their minds.  We... Read more
Do you back down to avoid conflict?

Do you back down to avoid conflict?

Many sensitive people back down to avoid conflict, fearing the intense overarousal conflict can cause. But avoiding conflict takes its own toll on you and your relationships. Is there a better way?  Elaine Aron says overarousal is the biggest relationship challenge... Read more
6 relationship benefits of deliberate forgetting

6 relationship benefits of deliberate forgetting

In our closest relationships, attentiveness and memory are key…but forgetting has benefits too. The venerable Alexander Pope rightfully declared that “To err is human; to forgive, divine.”So I hope he’ll forgive me for offering you my own version of his famous... Read more