Boundary-setting is a skill I learned the hard way. By “boundary-setting,” I mean the art of being honest with yourself and others about what you need and what you are and aren’t willing to do. This is easier said than done: our sense of what we are and aren’t responsible for can get very cloudy.

In this 9-minute video I share the story of a series of stressful household moves I went through fifteen years ago. During that time, I came to three key realizations about the relationship between boundaries, acceptance and control. And I saw how my happiness depended on my ability to put into action what I had learned: